Tea party

Katie: "What brings you here to this tea party?
Nathan: "I on't know."
Katie: "Tea?"
Nathan: "Yeah."

Matching

I picked up my little Nanners from the vet yesterday after her kitty mastectomy. I was so happy to hear she had come through the surgery fine, and a little sad that she had to recover yet again from surgery in the first place. I've had her for 12.5 years, and through that time she has

1. Been spayed
2. Had part of her tail amputated after Katie closed the door on it (Katie was only 1.5 years old at the time)
3. Had a dental (so just anesthesia, not surgery)
4. Had an abcess cleaned up/drained (from her one and only cat fight)
5. Had a kitty mastectomy

So as you can see, I'm pretty used to groggy Annie, used to giving her post-surgery antibiotics and pain meds, etc. I still felt so sorry for her, and we set up a little recovery suite for her in our downstairs bathroom and had planned to spoil her with comforts and love while she was only half-herself.

Of course, this is Annie, though, and so as soon as I let her out of her cage, she was writhing on the ground and purring with love (despite the 3 inches of stitches starting right in her armpit and going down her right/middle) and trying to get out of her recovery suite. She doesn't seem to mind having almost half of her body shaved, the 3 inches of cut apart and sewn together body, the pain, or anything.

When I look at my kitty, half-bald, with a 3-inch scar and missing her right mammary gland, it is easier to see how people can stand to look at me bald, with a 3-inch scar and missing my right mammary gland. When you care about something (or, with me and Nan, love it to pieces), it is possible to not even care about the missing parts*. I just feel so lucky to have whatever parts of her still with me - hopefully purring and writhing with love for many more years!

*Bill (and, to a lesser extent, Emma) has been trying to point this out to me, but actually feeling the emotion myself seems to have made the message hit home better.

My darling kitten

I posted some time ago about my sweet cat Annie (I call her Nanners, or Nan, or Nannie)...and how I should be more like her in this cancer journey. As it ends up, I am a bit more like her than I thought - I finally got all three pets to the vet yesterday (spring check-up became late summer check-up due to chemo treatments) and got confirmation that the horrendous looking lump around her nipple is, in fact, breast cancer. Apparently breast cancer is not terribly common in cats, it is found more in dogs...and I just want to say, "Universe, this is not what I meant by saying I wanted to be more like my cat!"

Actually, though, her cancer doesn't seem to have spread, and if she has a little cat lumpectomy (!) recovery from that surgery shouldn't be too bad. So she is set to go under the knife next Tuesday. For the cat who cozied up on my giant belly during all of my pregnancies and most recently, ALWAYS found me and settled in on my sad chemo belly, it is totally worth it (especially once I was convinced recovery wouldn't be long or overly hard on her).

As I write this, she is lying on my leg, and Nathan just came up to her to give her some gentle pets. Here is what transpired, Nanners purring the whole time:

Nathan: "I like Nannie."
Me: "She is such a good cat, isn't she?"
Nathan: "Yes, she been nice a me."

Then a few minutes later he came back and said, in his high, cute, pet voice:

"Are you Mommy's Nannie? Are you? Are you? Are you nice to me Nannie? Are you?"

Yes, she is nice to you, and to me. I hope we have her for a long, long time.

A discussion of my finer qualities with Katie

Me: "Well, Katie, I am not at all happy with this. BUT, I'm going to try to hold my temper because I don't want to yell at Daddy again during this hard week for him. And you KNOW how hard that will be for me, but I'm going to give it my best try."

Katie: "Mom, the strongest man in the world couldn't hold your temper."

(Then we both started laughing. I'm glad we can laugh about her experiences with menopause mom and her short temper...and I have to say, when Katie erupts, I know EXACTLY where that comes from. The Volcano Daughter is a close replica of her Volcano Mother!)

OMG!

Today I visited my oncologist's office, for the second time this week. On Monday, I went for my 3-week follow-up to chemo (don't know quite how that went as we had more questions for him about Sybil than about myself. totally neglected self.) and to sign my consent to participate in a clinical trial. Today, I began the clinical trial, which studies bisphosphonates and their potential to be used as a preventative measure against breast cancer recurrence. Bisphosphonates are also known to help strengthen bones, which should come in very handy for me, Mrs. Menopause-At-35-Years-of-Age.

I am on the IV arm of this study, which means that once a month I will get an infusion of Zometa (drug name - actual drug is Zoledronic Acid) for 6 months, then after that, every 3 months for 2.5 years. The amount of the drug (from Bill's research) in this arm of the study is a bit higher, and there are some potential side effects, but the convenience is quite nice. I would need my blood drawn on the same schedule (once a month, then once every three months) so this way they do everything through my port. I can't say I love being jammed with a needle in my port, but I am happy to not have to take a pill every morning for 3 years.

Anyway, it was just this week, with it's 2 appointments and me leaving withOUT being in a post-chemo haze that I noticed how the name of my oncologist's office is printed out on the receipt. Oakland Medical Group - OMG!

The fight against evil

The forts are set up for Power Girl (Katie), Power Boy (Nathan) and the leader, Flower Power Girl (Emma). The decision is being made - who should be the evil force which they must valiantly fight?

Emma: "Mom, do you want to be Evil?"
Me: "No, that's too close to real life."
Emma: "OK. Katie, go find a stuffed animal!"
Katie: "Yeah, it was a person but it changed into a animal when it became evil!"

Katie leaves. She returns with a pink bunny.

Katie: "We tried to make it good, but it was just too evil."

(You know those pink bunnies, they ARE so evil.)

Emma: "COME ON GUYS! THERE'S EVIL AFOOT!"

And off they run, to fight the pink bunny. I breathe a sigh of relief, because as long as there are pink bunnies to fight, I can take off my referee uniform. Lucken Wrestlemania has been put on the back burner for now as the Lucken children join together in the fight against evil.

Getting Inspiration from song lyrics

Gathering as far as I can reach
Perched up on a precipice
and this is what I've seen.

This is all I want, it's all I need...
This is all I am, it's everything
This is all I want, it's all I need...

But don't explain I'm sure I'll want to know
Don't forget we're just halfway from coal.

(from Beat a Drum, by R.E.M.)