2/24/09

The Hair Wars

This is something I wrote today for Trusera...but why not share it with my friends here? If I was writing it for this blog only, I would have related that JUST TODAY I figured out that I could use hats to help with my big giant hair problem. Can anyone say, clueless? I should also say that I know I could be coloring my hair to make it not look "like dirt", as Emma so delicately puts it...and that could probably boost my appearance a little. But I've never colored my hair before, and sort of want to make a point to my daughters that people are beautiful how they come. Who knows how long that is going to last, as I greet my dirt hair in the mirror each day!

So here is the post...

I think it is ironic that my biggest problem, throughout my experience with breast cancer, has been my hair. Honestly, despite having a bilateral mastectomy, an infection with one of my tissue expanders that required its removal and eventual reinsertion (and a chest that was half-flat, half-expanded for over 7 months), 4 surgeries on that chest, 5 weeks of drain tubes, so many battles with compression bras, breast forms, mastectomy bras and a bathing suit - it's the hair loss that bothered me the most. And today, as I sit here, my chest is put back together, but I am still at war with my hair!

I'm about 4 months into having hair again after chemotherapy (I remained essentially bald for almost 3 months after I finished chemo), and my hair is crazy. It's growing out, the same color that it was when I cut it off (the definition of dishwater blonde), but it seems thicker...and wants to stand straight up, as if it is saying, "Look at me! I'm here!" I've wanted that kind of body for as many years as I have had hair, but can now understand the drawbacks to such a situation.

Anyway, I am still happy to have hair with which I can wage battles...and have a few tools with which to do this. All of those hats I was SO happy to put away once there was a smidgeon of hair on my head are just waiting to be put into use again. I only regret I didn't start using them a few weeks ago ("You mean, some people wear hats when they have hair? That's news to me...") - I could have saved myself a lot of bad hair days!

P.S. - This is my 300th post. That's a lot of writing!

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