7/27/08

Can I blame this on chemo brain?

Tonight, I FORGOT about the swim team's end-of-the-year banquet! It is totally crazy that I forgot, as I am so incredibly proud of our family for making it through this swim season. When I got my diagnosis, I had Bill sign up for the season thinking "we might not get to all the practices, or the meets, but we'll just do what we can do." At the start of chemo (once I knew how it felt), I NEVER thought I would be able to get myself to meets on chemo days, or even get out of bed on the bad Saturdays (much less get the kids to their swim meets)! When I saw how almost all of the meets were on "bad days", I was so sad, and so worried.

I wasn't so sure this was the right thing for Katie, either - I had plans to get her lessons this spring before the season started but the diagnosis and surgeries sort of tossed those plans out the window. I knew from last year that she probably could swim on the team, that the meets would seem a whole lot better if she was on the team instead of sitting around for 5 hours waiting for her sister to swim, and that if she did swim this year, it would make things easier if this was her first year (she could be in the same age group as Emma) and for next year.

I watched Katie struggle down the lane for the first few days of practice hoping and praying she'd make it, and that this wouldn't scar her for life! I called 5 different places to see if we could squeeze in some individual lessons on the good days to help her get through. We were totally blessed with some great teachers at the Costick Center who made swimming fun for both of the girls, but especially for Katie (I cried when I thanked them at the end of the season)...and guess who won the Most Improved Award for the 8 and under Girls tonight? Miss Katie Lucken.

BUT, I missed it, I missed Katie's special little spotlight today at the banquet. Can I blame this on chemo brain? Because I can't believe I could miss hearing the coach talk about my little girl tonight. I want to be so mad at myself, but I really can't, because I remember how it felt to be at some of those meets* and I can't believe I made it there. I can't believe Katie did it, either. I can't believe she went from barely making it down the lane, from days when she would cry and say that she was the slowest on the team, to saying "I don't really know how to do the breaststroke, but I'll make it through it, some day." I'm just going be proud of what we pulled off this season, (especially what Katie pulled off) and not worry too much about what I missed hearing tonight.

Luckily, our friend Julie called to tell us about the award and we rushed up to the club so that Katie could get it:
p.s. - I'm so proud of Emma, too! At B finals, she won her event and got her fastest time of the season! (See event 37)

*I have to say, I did not always behave very well at some of these meets. There were at least two occasions when someone tried to tell me to "let her find her spot" and leave Katie to get to the right place for marshalling (where they sit waiting to be taken up to the starting blocks) and I so jealously guarded my right to take her there and assure her that she would be fine that I snapped! "She is 6 years old, my 8 year old can find her spot just fine, but Katie is 6, I'm happy to help her find her spot, and I WILL HELP HER FIND HER SPOT!" Blame that extra-meanness on chemo too!

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