11/5/08

Lucky Girl

I have a superstition about luck and prayers these days. Sometimes I find myself thinking, "Please, God, can you help me with this?" only to quickly take it back and say, "WAIT! I didn't really mean that!" I don't want to waste my luck and prayers on something silly like opening up our broken vacuum to empty the chamber; I'm saving it up for larger things like no recurrence or metastasis!

I still get cranky about broken vacuums. I know I'm hard on them, what with the 7 pets, 3 children, an outside-time obsession and my interest in keeping my feet dirt-and fur-free indoors. Alas, I think our 3 vacuums have had enough, and I didn't use my luck and prayers to ask for them to work longer. So, broken vacuums and crankiness...but then I decided to focus on the ways I have been lucky instead.

Today's list: How Lucky Pam has Been (even when she didn't know it)
  1. I was lucky to meet my husband...and lucky that he didn't listen to me all those years when I told him to find someone better. Really, who would stick by a person for 7 years, listening to that (before something like marriage or a formal engagement was forcing him to)? He has proven his devotion to me and to my family, time and time again, even when I am bald, deformed, calling him a hundred times a day, or asking him to change another poopy diaper.
  2. I am lucky I followed the urge to have my children when I did. I didn't think so at the time, as I didn't know anyone my age with babies and felt like a bit of a pariah on that front. I even surprised myself and Bill with the urge - a sort of the heart-leading- the- head scenario ensued each time as Overachiever Pam who so wanted a great career gave way so that this totally New Pam could take over.
  3. I'm lucky I had that fall in the basement and found my breast cancer when checking myself to see if I had healed.
  4. I'm lucky we moved into this house when we did. It has the perfect amount of space and a separate living quarters which has allowed my sister to bring her baby and help keep my family running every time I am recuperating from something.
  5. I'm MORE lucky that I was given such loving sisters. I knew they were giving, caring people, but I did not anticipate or expect A to be driving back to MI with her little baby in tow each time I had something hard to go through! And I did not anticipate J flying her family here twice and spending both her and T's PTO visiting her dilapidated sister.
  6. I'm lucky we decided to stay in Michigan and raise our family here, against my desire to move to other places and see how other people live. We live so close to so many family members who have been our support through this year - my mother-in-law, my stepmother and father, my aunts and uncles, Bill's family.
  7. I'm lucky to have the friends that I have...crazy lucky, as I am not so good at staying in touch. Plus I did start this family a little earlier than some, which kept me busy in a different way. I'm still amazed that I have any friends, I feel unworthy..and then to have such kind friends humbles me even more.
  8. I'm lucky for my pets, and for Bill's tolerance of them. They are such fun diversions, even if they are a lot of work. And now I have to go back to the task of getting them all ready, cleaned up, and prepared for me to be out of commission for a few weeks!

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Hi Pam,

My name is Elliot Watson and I'm part of Trusera's product management team. Trusera is an online health network that allows people to share real-world health experiences.

I've read through your blog and I was moved by your posts. You're an excellent writer with a great perspective on how to live life!

Currently, at Trusera, we're focusing on building a breast cancer community specific to those who understand and have dealt with the BRCA gene.

We're extremely interested in having you write for Trusera as a paid stipend blogger. I know you can add a lot of helpful information to our site. This would also be a great way to broaden your reach and touch a larger group of women.

If you're interested please contact me at watson@trusera.com and I'll gladly explain the details of the program to you.

I hope your surgery on Friday goes smoothly. I send my best wishes that it does.

Take care,

Elliot Watson
Product Management
watson@trusera.com
Office - 206-709-3065 ext. 1350
Direct - 719-641-2430

Feel free to check out www.trusera.com