I've decided to stay off the erg/other exercises that might involve my torso for a while, and lo and behold, my rib is feeling better. My emotions are feeling crazier, though, of course! I really enjoy that mindless-exercise-time...it is my best way of unwinding. I could use some unwinding after a busy first week+ of getting-into-the-school groove!
I did want to remember two things, though, before my life moves away too quickly and I forget again, so I'm going to write them here.
Nathan had a harder 2nd day of preschool, and was holding on to my hand so tightly, not joining up with the other kids, etc. (as if I would leave him if he didn't hold me tight enough, which is what I ended up doing, so he was right). Apparently this is normal - the first day is so interesting and on the second they know they are being left and it isn't so novel anymore! There was no crying, but he wasn't happy and it took a while before I was able to leave him.
At school Nathan reverts to the almost-3 year old, quieter boy, but at home he is an almost-3-year old boy with vocabulary and influences from the 6-9 year old girl crowd. He has this phrase which he uses all the time, and it is so perfect for how he was when I was dropping him off: "Oh, FINE. But I'm not happy 'bout it."
2) Last night, my father-in-law left us a message...and he always ends his messages with "Take Care..." I love that phrase...it never seems to get old for me, it always seems earnest no matter who says it or under what circumstance (I know that's probably not always the case, it could be just a stock phrase, but it is one that hasn't lost it's luster with me.) Yesterday, though, my father-in-law left another saying, "Be Happy" and that made me stop. What a nice thing to say, and really, why not try our hardest to do that?
Happiness isn't something that always just comes - and I can see that this week a lot with Emma starting at a new school, and Katie being a big first grader now, and Nathan starting preschool, and Bill being super-busy at work, and me juggling lots of comings and goings and trying to squeeze other responsibilities in the 1 hour here and 1/2 hour there before we need to come or go again. NOT TO MENTION the whole world of breast cancer and worries that come along when that part of the world opens up (sort of how when a person is pregnant, they start seeing the world of parenthood which was there all along but suddenly it exists for that person...the cancer world is here all along but it doesn't always really exist for you until you experience it closely - through yourself or through a loved one's cancer).
But really, I know from those who came before me that it doesn't get any easier (and I know that from my life, lately!), so I'm going to keep that phrase in my head if I can, and try my best to just "be happy". It is a choice we make, and it is a great thing to hold as a goal.