One day, when I was working in the rowing office at the University of Michigan (long after my rowing career was finished), I said something to the coaches, that someday I would like to kick ass at SOMEthing. My former coach (and subsequent boss at UM) said something to the effect of "Oh, PC, you could kick some serious butt if you wanted to." I was dubious at the time...enmeshed in motherhood and stuff like that.
But suddenly, about 9 weeks post-chemo, I am having a problem with a significant post-chemo side effect. I have too much energy - like crazy, crazy energy. Such crazy energy that when I came home from a run yesterday, I made my whole family line up in front of my house to watch how fast I can run! They lined up chairs on our hill and I did sprints back and forth in front of the house. (Not many, but still. I have lost my mind with energy.) I'm running through parking lots, and when I ran up to the doors of Emma's school the other day, the office helper asked for my i.d. - like I was a terrorist coming to destroy the school! I guess they aren't used to bald women running up to the front doors of school everyday. People have been asking me if they can help me with something, because it must always look like something is wrong!
No nothing is wrong...it's just that I've spent the last 7 months going through breast cancer treatment. I'm so used to working so hard to heal, that when there is no healing that needs to be done, I can't slow down to anything slower than a mild trot. I'm actually looking forward to my oophorectomy in about a week...I'll be able to put all of my extra energy to good use, healing from having my ovaries and fallopian tubes removed. Until then, I just know I'm going to keep waking up each day with more sore muscles - from running, impromtu dance parties, Tae Bo kicks while I wait at the bus stop, wrestling with my children - but my body is used to such extraneous effort that it is begging me to do these things (and make a fool of myself, wherever I am, apparently).
As I learn to deal with this somewhat explosive power chemo has unleashed in me, I guess my old coach WAS right. I could kick some serious butt, if I wanted to - I think I may have kicked chemo's butt (or maybe my own, while I was going through chemo). It's good to know I've fulfilled that wish...